Monday, July 1, 2013

Finding my rhythm

My core desired feelings are making me fall completely totally in love with my life and all those who touch it. That's you, reading this. Yes, you.

I'm getting better at this business of running my thoughts and actions through the filter of "how does this make me feel?" Does this make me feel: Succulent? Magnetic? Magical? Awestruck? Entrenched?

The answer is almost always yes. I'm not quite sure if it's that I lead an unbelievably amazing life or if it's that the eternal Pollyanna in me can find or create succulence, magnetism, magic and be completely caught up with being awestruck and enthusiastically connected in solidarity through a vivid kaleidoscope of communion with every person as a soul friend in this wild daily adventure (my definition of entrenched). Either way, HELL. YES!

So, I've found myself all over the place this past places both mentally, emotionally and physically where maybe those core desired feelings aren't commonplace. Most strikingly, there was some fear and anger. Vulnerability. Procrastination. Good old fashioned dirt.

Breathing into the fear, I realized that it only comes from having such amazingness in my life that any threat against it is frightening. Succulent. Awestruck. Entrenched.

Pressing into the anger, I knew that the other person's actions were only because I am succulent. Magnetic. Magical. And by that definition above? Entrenched, for sure. That left me awestruck.

Standing, crying tears of joy in a hallway full of people who depend on me to hold it together. Crying from the deepest most tender part of my soul and feeling my vulnerability pull those around me closer. Entrenched. Magnetic.

Curled up on my momma's couch reading a book with twenty other things comfortably simmering unattended on the back burner. Self care, self love. Succulent.

Sweaty, hair stuck to my forehead and filthy hands...but smiling and sunkissed because I wasn't only feeling Succulent and Magical...I was BEING both. Resulting in magnetic.


Awestruck. All the time.


  1. Your Core Desire Feelings are so rich and juicy! I love the words.

  2. when you were in the hallway, i was crying with you, on the back deck with the sun glimmering through the branches of the apple tree,in the city that is anxiously awaiting your arrival.
    when that old fashioned dirt that you speak of shows up, add some water and make something pretty with it so that its not just dirt but fancy dirt :) I love you and cant wait for you, your succulent, juicy, delicious, magical self to be in this place where i can hug you each and every day for a week! xoxox